the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
