They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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