Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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