I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
