I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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