I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
