I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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