i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
