SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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