did you get engaged???
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
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