oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Randomize
