Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Everything about him screamed your future.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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