I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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