it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
