no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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