Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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