So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
