what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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