The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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