Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
