it wasn't lemon gatorade
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
