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• (857): View more from Massachusetts

  Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.

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• (386): View more from Florida

  Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.

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• (562): View more from California

  So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (509): View more from Washington

  Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps

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• (931): View more from Tennessee

  it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.

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