We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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