I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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