Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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