so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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