Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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