if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Randomize
