that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
