Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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