the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Watching her eat just hurts me
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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