then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
