Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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