Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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