my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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