i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
