I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
