people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
