i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize