The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
he fucked my hip out of place.
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thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
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I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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