Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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