Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
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