I should be sponsored by Trojan
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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