so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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