I've blown a few things in my day
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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