I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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