I think I am morally bankrupt
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
