just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize
