You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
