After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
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You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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