You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
