i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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