Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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